Yeah, I probably could have put that better. But it strikes me that when faced with an immediate crisis, John is very good at getting through that crisis (so for example, the fake colt plan gets Meg to stop killing everyone, even though John has to know that the odds are against his getting out alive -- or the decision to disappear with his sons, when it looks like the other mechanic is going to call in social workers, which set their whole lives in motion... I guess I see that as a defining moment for John, actually.) Obviously, though, I agree that John is extremely competent and extremely focused, but i think that he spends a lot of effort on the things which are in his control precisely because there's so much that isn't in his control.

And I i think that a lot of how John was in this episode is making me rethink him.