I see your point here. Personally, I take this kind of list all in good fun--a kind of collective "blowing off steam" moment. Everyone has their little squick points, and there's a limit to how much attention any individual author can and should pay to them. I wouldn't suggest, for example that no one should ever use the term "boy" in a slash fic. But I won't be reading that fic, because it's a weird little thing I find intolerable. It doesn't mean that the person who uses the word is a bad writer, or is doing something wrong.